My problems in life can be likened unto a computer virus.....seriously though, I just got a computer virus this last week (Taylor if you read this, it's because I tried finding that anime TV show you told me I NEEDED to watch and was all online. I never found the episodes, but oh buddy, did I find a computer virus....) Anyway, so in the aftermath of the anger and frustration and the "porque Rosa porque?????", I pondered what lesson Heavenly Father would have me learn from this. (And NO, Shannon, I'm NOT buying your version of the "practical joke" God was playing on me). What I did realize was actually quite profound.
First let me explain a bit about the virus. It was disguised as an anti-spyware program, and it looked exactly like it was part of Windows 7 so it made it seem like a program that had already been on your computer from the beginning of time. All of the sudden it pops up with warnings that the computer has been infected and runs a "scan", which reveals lots of virus's that can only be removed by upgrading the "regular" virus protection to get the version with anti-spyware.
So, I kid you not, my initial reaction was: WHAT. THE. HECK. Stupid virus, stupid computer. I knew that this program was probably the virus itself. But then something tricksy happened. The virus had somehow blocked all of my other programs from me, so I couldn't open the internet, or anything else. All that popped up was more messages from the anti-spyware virus, more diverse and more urgent, telling me I needed to get this upgrade before my computer was destroyed. I suddenly remembered that while I did have a good anti-virus program on my computer, I didn't have any anti-spyware or malware program. And even though at first I KNEW this was a fake, I slowly let my defenses down. I begin to question, "what if?" What if I do have these virus the "scan" was showing me? What if this really is a part of Windows 7? What if there is no other way to get this off my computer? And the messages kept coming and coming, and for what ever lame reason, I couldn't figure out a way around it, except by getting the upgrade offered, which though at first seemed like the worst idea on the face of the planet, now suddenly seemed like the only way to save my computer. And so I caved. Right after I put in all my info and clicked "Buy", I knew without doubt what had just happened and how I fell for the lamest trick in the book, and now in addition to still having a stupid virus, I had to cancel my credit card.
I feel like this was a big reflection of my life lately. There have been a lot of things that Satan has been whispering to me over and over again. Things like "you're not good enough", "you'll never accomplish any of your goals", "your past is too messed up to ever have the future you once dreamed of having", etc., etc. When I first heard these thoughts, I rejected them right away, for clearly they were from the adversary. But one things about Satan, he never gives up. The messages keep coming, each time a little different, each time a little more urgent. And he tries to block the good things from you too. Soon your resistance starts to wear away, and you begin to question, "what if?" And soon you start believing the messages, and thinking that they really are true.
Luckily though, I did recognize the virus, and I was able to get my sister to help me find the program to get rid of the virus. It didn't completely get rid of the virus though, the virus was tricksy and found ways to get around the clean-up. But luckily one of the people in my FHE group works with computers, and he was able to go through my computer and completely fix everything.
And so it is with our lives too. We can do a lot in our lives to get rid of Satan and his influence. But we aren't enough by ourselves, we'll never be able to completely overcome him on our own. But luckily we have an older brother who has all the knowledge and all the power to eradicate the wrongs in our life. Our Savior can do what we cannot, he can fix us and make us clean again, and give us the extra power and strength we need to resist Satan in the future. I'm so grateful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ in my life, and for all that He did for me, and that because of Him, I can be clean again. I can find strength through Him to overcome the temptations of Satan, and He will help me accomplish the goals I have and live a full and happy life. So even though these "virus's" will give us pain and trouble, we have the cure. We have the real "Anti-Virus" who will always protect us from harm if we turn to Him and keep Him in our lives.